Life Lately :: Life while crippled.

I've been making it through lately.  While I haven't been thrilled receiving my medical bills from the x-rays, MRI, and costs just to have someone "read" the MRI, I'm ecstatic to be going back to the doctor and heading out to Chicago on Wednesday!  I've got a two day week ahead (with a couple of really loud kids going to be absent!) and focusing on the positive.  As for the last two weeks, I haven't focused much on the gym (everything gets really tiring and old with a knee scooter and crutches) but I have been enjoying reading and relaxing.

 [What do you do on your first weekend with crutches and off Whole 30?  Go explore campgrounds and eat/drink Mexican fare.]

 [Teacher appreciation week was really good to me.  I'm so incredibly lucky to have a job I love and where I'm appreciated.]

 [Awesome cards from Happy Dappy Bits!  Cards are eco-friendly and I used the Congrats card to celebrate my running friend's graduation from nursing school.]

 [Enjoying a Terrapin Tree Hugger + my favorite tuna app from Tyler's Taproom.  Sometimes it's good to get out and about while on crutches.]

 [When you're semi-handicapped and working with three year-olds, your weeks don't feel shorter.  Sometimes Friday celebrations deserve local beer.]

 [This happened for about 10 minutes at Target.  I swear that thing almost died on me in the middle of the aisle.  Ditched it in the pharmacy section. Damn did my arms hurt after crutching around the entire rest of the store.]

 [Favorite lunchtime activity :: writing cards and reading.  Trying to finish up Animal, Vegetable, Miracle before we start our book for book club.]

 [A "mixer" at Foundation for the first book club meeting.  It was a success and I can't wait for the next meet-up!]

 [My first time cooking with collard greens.  They were one of the only local produce finds at Whole Foods.]

 [Falafel made with chick peas and collard greens!]

[D came home a night early before he flew out again!  We enjoyed a lazy Saturday and tried out the pizza at Trophy Brewing.  Loved the pizza (and of course the beer)!]

If you're still hanging around after all these pictures, here's what I'm loving lately...

• I'm obsessed with smoothies these days, and how smart is it to add green tea to a smoothie like Sarah did?
• I loved Lesley's post about being an introvert, which I totally am.
• Ashley introduced me to this amazing article about making lunch with Michael Pollan, whom I just adore.  Definitely worth a read!
• Katie's Tofu Lo Mein looks unbelievably easy and delicious!
• Kelley's pictures of her work have me swooning over starting a coffee shop one day...
• So in love with Alex's orange top and the backdrop of these pictures.  She's just the cutest!
• I really want someone to make these cookies from Nikki.  They look amazing!
• In an effort to be less selfish this year, I'm trying to keep in mind these 18 ways to be a better friend.

Forgiveness.

Ashley's apology the other day really got me thinking.  I rarely share about my family, my intimate relationships, friends...the real personal stuff that gets to the core of who you are.  Why?  Mainly, I think that some things should be kept private.  Things can be said in a moment; any one can read what I say in little space of mine. And to be honest, I like to focus on primarily the happy and positive aspects of my life.  That's what makes me most happy. Reliving the best parts of my life, not the worst.  Sometimes though, you have to be brutally honest with yourself and get to the heart of matters.

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Negativity can get the best of me.  At heart, I am a pessimistic and complaining person.  I've been trying to work on cutting some additional negativity out of my life.  I have drastically cut out blogs that annoyed me more than not and simply deleted (not just hid) facebook "friends" that gave me an additional reason to complain on any given day.  Unfortunately, the negativity, frustration, and anger that can not be cut out is family.

[via]

Back to forgiveness.  One simple thing Ashley said really made me think,

"I forgive you because I love you."

As an adult, not child, of divorce, with two young siblings (and one older) who still live at home, I hold on to so much anger, frustration, hurt, and helplessness.  I have no relationship with my mother.  A multitude of emotions are the result of this faulted "relationship."  Anger, hurt, confusion, worry, frustration.  I often wonder what would go through my mind if she ever reached out to me, tried {again} to bridge that gap.  Could I forgive?  Could I forget?  So much of me feels like these two go hand in hand.  Is forgiveness as simple as Ashley says?  My mind says I can not forgive and certainly never forget.  The hurt and emotion seem to go too deep.  Is there an invisible line that is crossed by another that leads you to feel incapable of forgiving, feel the fear of continual hurt?

Obviously, my feelings and emotions go much deeper that I would delve into in this space.  The hurt that I feel goes beyond me, to others much more innocent and incapable of fully understanding.  Families are a complicated thing.  My only hope and wish is that this makes me a stronger and better person in the end.

Food & Beer Friday :: What the bock?

After a tough week, month, three months, day, I deserved a beer.  I'm a big fan of Anchor beers as evidenced here and here.  I couldn't resist picking up a brown brew from this brewery.  Anchor Bock Beer was actually a wonderful surprise after an exhausting spring day.  While we're approaching the horizon of summer, I want to relish these glorious days of spring while I can.  Anchor describes a bock best,

"In the ancient bock tradition, the dark-colored brew is released in time for springtime celebrations. Bock beers are believed to have originated in the town of Einbeck, Germany and traditionally feature a goat on their labels. The term, “bock” occurs in several Germanic languages and roughly translates to “billy goat”, but there are some unlikely alternatives. Followers of the zodiac have described it as a beer for Capricorn, the time when, as the days grow longer, brewers brew their bock beers in anticipation of the coming of spring."

I love the story behind the bock.  I was pleasantly surprised by this brew.  While I didn't have any real expectations, I imagined something hoppy.  This wasn't hoppy at all.  The Bock Beer was malty with a bit of bitterness, likely resulting from the chocolate and roasted barley.  I tasted a roastiness which was a sweet surprise!  The goat?  It's contributed to the "kick" behind this bock.  If you can still find this brew, pick it up for an easy drinking brown ale!

Now, head on over to Sarah's and say hello while you link up!

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Travel Tuesday :: Adventures in camping.

After my little week of depression, I mentioned D and I were headed camping.  North Carolina is full of amazing state parks.  A couple of years ago, D and I tent camped at Falls Lake Recreation Area.  For our first pop-up camper trip, we decided to go to Jordan Lake Recreation Area.  There's quite a few campground around Jordan Lake, but after some exploring we liked Poplar Point best.  D went on Thursday and got us a nice site with electricity and all.

 [This bad boy has had three generations of Walkers sleep in it! (Maybe four one day?!)]

Since D went down a day and a half before me, he set up the entire campsite by himself.  This is some hardcore stuff too.  That cabinet above keeps all of your cooking necessities nearby but stored away (close for you, safe from animals).

While I wish there was some green on that plate, sorry.  I'm not sorry.  Camping has always been a time that I can indulge in foods and snacks that I never eat (I'm looking at you Garden Salsa SunChips).  Venison burgers (since venison is flexitarian for me), baked beans, and grilled corn is the perfect way to start a camping trip.

French press coffee and chocolate and peanut butter chip pancakes are an amazing way to start your day (after already sleeping in).  Seriously camping food might be the best...  After breakfast and being incredibly sore/tight from my injury, I wanted to start my day off with some outdoor yoga.  My yoga guru, Ashley, sent me some links, and I had one of the best yoga workouts ever.

This view is what I'm talking about.  I laid out the mat under the trees and the sunlight.  I plugged in my headphones (mainly to drown out the loud college kids across the way) and turned on the Yogini Pandora station.  It was amazing, simply amazing.

Cloud Atlas was a doozy to get through (so long), but in my opinion a day is no better spent than in front of the fire with a book.  We spent the entire day reading and relaxing.

Grilled pizza, chocolate popcorn, hot chocolate, and s'mores.  Perfect end to a little camping getaway.

Not so perfect?  A disabled girl trying to pee in the woods (who's wasting time driving and crutching up to the bath house) with a family next door.  Props to D for rigging a tarp and getting me hooked up.  While alcoholic beverages are prohibited in the parks, do you think it stopped D and I?  So imagine our surprise when the park ranger knocked on our camper door Sunday morning.  Oh shit.  Things got real (which means the last four of our beers had to be poured out).  Oh the memories...

12 Months of Giving :: April recap + May goals.

I'm a little late here.  I've been focusing on recovering and rehabing the injury and spending well-deserved time with D while he's in town.  

Let's go back to April though.  I wasn't quite sure what to do about April's goal of running a race for a cause since I'm out of commission as a runner.  I switched it up and made the decision to volunteer for the Run Raleigh half since I couldn't run it.  The race director promptly contacted me and said she could use a volunteer for packet pick-up the night before the race or giving out water at the end of the race.  I preferred to be a part of the race itself, so I chose to hand out water.

There is definitely something amazing about watching all of the runners start and finish the race.  It was worth the early rising on a Saturday (to not run a race).  While I don't think it was the best idea to stand for 4 hours in the boot, it was a great experience watching the runners.  I was amazed by some of the quick finishing times but also by those last runners who were committed to finishing. I loved congratulating and spreading cheer to the runners.

I knew I couldn't transfer my race entry, but it turns out you get a free race entry when you volunteer at one of the races in the series!  Sadly the Rock N' Roll series is coming to Raleigh displacing this local, spring race.  Happily, I'm going to have a second shot to run this race in October!  I'm scared but excited!

I didn't end up switching May and April goals (which is good since I still can't run).  This month I will be contributing to my local shelter.  Raleigh has a handful of local shelters.  I'll be picking one and donating some items off their wish list.  Many shelters have wish lists, as well as links to directly (and easily) donate money, on their website.  This is a way to give back that takes little time and little money.  

Need to find a homeless shelter near you?  Check out Homeless Shelter Directory, Salvation Army, or simply google homeless shelter in ________.  It's that easy!

Do you plan to give back in May?

Food & Beer Friday :: Something a little saucey.

Even though I've been off the grids and the blog scene, it doesn't mean I haven't been drinking!  This week I decided to pull out another NC local like last week.  Big Boss Brewing is a pretty cool brewery in Raleigh.  They have awesome events in the brewery, and you'll likely spot a food truck or two out there.  If I ever recover from my injury, I like to join the run club that is hosted at the brewery as well. 

Based on my love for farmhouse ales, I picked up this saison at Bottle Revolution back before I started Whole 30.  Saison is kind of a "proper" name for a farmhouse ale.  This type of beer can be loosely described as a pale ale that's more carbonated.  As for Big Boss' Saucey Pants, it's only 4.5% alcohol and definitely easy to drink.  The brew has that dry, "farmhouse funk" to it with the hop bitterness definitely coming through.  Unfortunately, I was left hoping for a little something more.  The beer just felt...mediocre.  

Nonetheless, I would totally recommend visiting Big Boss if you're ever in the Raleigh area!  It's an awesome spot.  Some of my other favorite beers from them include Big Operator, Aces & Ates, and Harvest Time.

Head on over to Sarah's blog and link-up this week!

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Food & Beer Friday :: Fathom this.

For those of you not familiar with North Carolina, Raleigh is part of the area of NC deemed "the Triangle.  Raleigh, Durham, and Chapel Hill make up that triangle.  There are a lot of breweries, brew pubs, and everything in between in this area.  Unfortunately, not many of these breweries warrant a spotlight.  Trophy Brewing is a different story.  Trophy just opened up in March in Raleigh.  They're brewing some amazing beers and will be serving pizza sooner than later.  

On to the beer!  Trophy is the perfect spot to stop in on your way home and grab a growler of beer and pizza for dinner.  D picked up a growler of 30 Fathoms baltic porter for us.  While it's not your typical spring brew, this beer was delicious!  It had the flavors of a stout with the body of a porter.  The beer's chocolatey flavors were prominent.  It's 7% alcohol but goes down so easily!

If you're ever in the Raleigh area, check out Trophy Brewing & Pizza!  If I hadn't been injured for the past 9 weeks, I would have joined in on the runs from my local YMCA that end at Trophy.  Some of my favorite beers from them include the Best in Show, Limbo Champ, and Slingshot Coffee Porter.

What have you been sipping on recently?

Now go link-up with Sarah and I!

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